We’ve been living with the new realities of Covid-19 for over half a year. While scientists know a fair amount about this virus now, there are still more questions than answers in our daily lives.
These months of uncertainty prompted me to re-evaluate my decision to take a break from posting on this blog. In a time of so much confusion, can we gain clarity by coming together with our questions?
At first, I’ll admit there was isolation, anxiety, and an impulse to panic-buy. My husband works on the frontlines of healthcare, and so I was wiping down and disinfecting everything he touched between coming home and heading straight to the shower.
However, once we had our habits of hand washing, masking, and social distancing ingrained, there was time to sit with the questions instead of reacting and stressing over them.
I’d like to share my essential take-aways from these challenging months…
It’s uncomfortable to say I don’t know. But once you move past the initial discomfort of admitting you can’t see what the future will bring, there’s a lot of wisdom available from living within the present.
That answers will probably take more time than we want.
That our early answers will likely be incomplete.
That those answers might later be revealed to be incorrect.
It’s so tempting to demand facts about what we’re facing, as if they should spring forth fully formed and incontrovertible. Yet the electric lights that we now take for granted were once just a theory…and it took Thomas Edison years and over 3,000 designs before he discovered a working lightbulb.
I set aside my blogging over a year ago in order to discover where I wanted to apply my time and talents as I moved into a new phase of life. In reality, my time away became an intense roller-coaster of inner work, and I don’t claim to be done.
I’m overly optimistic about what I can accomplish in a single day. And I still have trouble putting firm boundaries around my writing time, because I hate saying no when someone asks for help.
Living with the added questions during this time of Corona hasn’t been easy. My concerns are no longer just how do I want to contribute to my world and share my creative work, but will my family be safe, will the economy continue to support us financially, and when will we start to feel normal again?
Two realizations came to me recently, however, that helped reduce my fears and get me creating and contributing to life once more.
I can’t cure Covid-19, or provide for the millions of unemployed, or fix all the tensions facing our country. But I can choose to reach out to my community, and do what I can to encourage and enable those who need help.
Positive change and outcomes are still possible, even if we’re surrounded by uncertainty and tragedy.
From the moment the virus became real to me (both kids suddenly “home-schooling”), I wanted nothing but guarantees that they would stay safe and life would go right back to normal. And when that didn’t happen, it was easy to become lost in a fear spiral—complaining about all the things we could no longer do, worrying about the next crisis on the horizon.
What’s helped me break free from these anxieties has been setting intentions for my days and moving through them one small step at a time. No matter how crazy life gets, I can meet each day with a calm outlook, and focus on achieving success through bite-size accomplishments.
Ultimately, Covid-19 lead me to make a re-commitment to my writing. I’ve set the intention to express my truth, as well as my uncertainties, through this blog. I’m resurrecting my posts, but in a different format going forward.
One of my favorite poems is The Invitation by Oriah Mountain Dreamer. Her words offer encouragement to look beyond a person’s surface to discover what truly fuels their life.
“I want to know what you ache for and if you dare to dream of meeting your heart’s longing.”~ Oriah Mountain Dreamer
That sentiment is part of the hope I had when first creating this blog—to connect with other people seeking to know and live their passions. I long to be able to inhabit the heights of joy and survive the depths of sorrow, and to share my story openly and courageously with people wrestling with similar questions.
So I’d like to re-extend the invitation for you to join me here. I plan to reflect on thoughts and ideas that matter to me, even though they’re often overlooked during crazy, stressful times such as these.
I expect a shorter format than my previous posts, and more flexible scheduling. Yet my Intention remains to find ways to connect with what really matters and to share the discoveries we all experience while living with the questions.